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My name is Clint Haugen. I am a writer living in Bend, Oregon. Subscribe to the blog for tons of free content. Thank you for your time and attention.
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Virtue Or Vice?
“Sometimes, Young Padawan, what we think are our virtues are actually our vices.” “. . . You've been pretty annoying lately, Master.” “My...
Clint Haugen
Jun 82 min read
If Animals Had A Religion
I saw the quote, “If animals had a religion, Humanity would be the devil.” It sounded pretty cool at first. It really got me...
Clint Haugen
Jun 21 min read
We Can't All Be Cowards
“I hate insecure men,” she said to me, referring to her ex-boyfriend. “They’re too toxic to be with. Insecure men can’t handle a strong,...
Clint Haugen
Jun 12 min read
Scorpion's Sting Ya
Never trust a lady who has a visible scorpion tattoo. I promise you, if she has a visible scorpion tattoo, she's trouble. If you...
Clint Haugen
Jun 11 min read
Lebowski For President 2018
Some guy in line behind me Kept scooting closer to me . . . Some weird Ugly Sandal wearing Bald headed Fuck Kept creeping closer to me!...
Clint Haugen
Jun 11 min read
Lust
“The strongest men all fell to lust in the stories.” “Welp, good thing I have noodle arms then, huh?? Ha!” “Your arms are actually...
Clint Haugen
Jun 12 min read
Fantasy
Yeah, I can do it on my own, too I can thrive alone I’ve been on this road Without a co-passenger Without an answer...
Clint Haugen
May 301 min read
Apparently
“What’re you writing about today?” she asked him. “I don't know yet.” Huh? How does that work? Shouldn't you know??” “I'm waiting for it...
Clint Haugen
May 241 min read
Until
This kid worked with the old folks for awhile, And another one of the things he learned about life from them was, ...
Clint Haugen
May 241 min read
Fair Play
You’re telling me that Artificial Intelligence can write a whole ass book in minutes???! How cool. If the A.I. can write better than me,...
Clint Haugen
May 241 min read
The Price
To be fully known is to be vulnerable, and that’s the price of a real connection. You can't be loved without showing...
Clint Haugen
May 241 min read
A Gift
“Happiness was never your choice,” the little ugly witch said to her. “It was always a gift.’ -CH 5/24/25
Clint Haugen
May 241 min read
Pirates
A goofy looking ship with a giant jolly roger floated into the Bay of Monte Charllowe. My Bay. Pirates. Damn pirates; Always chasing...
Clint Haugen
May 173 min read
The Wandering Privilege
“People almost invariably arrive at their beliefs not on the basis of proof but on the basis of what they find attractive.” Most of who...
Clint Haugen
May 162 min read
Honest
It's better to be honest about being a liar than it is to lie about being honest. -CH 5/15/25
Clint Haugen
May 161 min read
Excuses
You’ll have to excuse him, He grew up thinking that love was a fight, And that the fight was love. He then learned to love...
Clint Haugen
May 161 min read
The Ghost
I saw a ghost yesterday She was at the coffee shop I go to She was just sitting there Sipping her tea With her back to me I...
Clint Haugen
May 122 min read
Growing Pains
A bearded man plucked at a guitar in the back of the poorly lit dive bar Some country twang echoed through my ears as I sat at a...
Clint Haugen
May 122 min read
The Cure
While out for a jog In the woods by my house I ran into an old lady At first I thought she could be a bit crazy She looked like she was...
Clint Haugen
May 122 min read
How To Be
I forgot how to be me I just Adapted To everyone To everything And before I knew it I wasn’t me anymore I was a programmed...
Clint Haugen
May 122 min read
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