What Might've Been
It echoes in my chest
An angry drum
And a sad hum
Dun dun dun
A vibration that travels through the bones
And into the teeth
I clench my jaw to kill it
But it’s a persistent bastard
And it wants life
I know the owl in my mind feeds it
I know the wolf in my soul calls it’s name
The angry drum and the sad hum
Dun dun dun
It is terrible music
And it hurts me
This musician
Me
He’s a real ass-hole
He’s frustration seeps out
And you can hear it in his music
It hurts him
More than it hurts them
Dun dun dun
Sometimes
I can out think it
I can beat it
I can play better music
But sometimes
The stream of negativity wins
And it drums and drums and drums
With that low vibration
That sad hum
Dun dun dun
It's something about being human
Some sort of pain
That happens
When you look too closely at
life,
people,
history,
politics,
nature
etc
When you see it
It haunts you
Like a demon
Poison of the brain
A deafening of the soul
Dun…
Dun…
Dun...
Its spiders crawling up the spine
And dirty fingernails
And headaches
Its that dull heartbreak
and an angry ache
I bend and bend and bend
Afraid that someday I’ll break
Sometimes that dull ache
Is more full then dull
And still
To feel
Something real
It’s all I need
To heal
Dun dun dun
The angry tune in the background
Is always there if you listen
The trick is
Not to pay attention
To distract
And nap
And turn around that ship
That steers us into the storm
It’s a slow burn
A searing heat
And the body is the meat
Mixed with a soul
Diving into the pit
The pain of being bit by the snake
That tree of knowledge
That apple
The bite
What might’ve of been
If we stayed ignorant until the end.
-C.H.