Just A Woman

She was just a woman

I kept telling myself this

Over and over

Repeating it in my mind

She was just a woman

She wasn’t that great

She wasn’t that special

She meant nothing

Lies

All lies

I told myself lies

Over and over

Repeating it in my mind

A delusion

I had too

It was the only way to make it

To make it to another day

She was just a woman

I didn’t need to think about her

She wasn’t worth it

I’d find someone better

Much better

Someone who fits

Not someone who leaves the holes

Now these holes needed feeling

Who can fit in these holes left by her?

So far

No one

She left me her music

And

Her authors

I read

And I listened

In a perpetual state of remembrance

She was there with me

I hated her for this

I didn’t want her there

But I loved these musicians

I loved these authors

I had loved her too

Not anymore

I didn’t want to

It had been too long

We didn’t know each other anymore

I had changed too much

Maybe she had too

One thing was forsure

Things would never be like they were

Things had changed

Time marched on

The days past

And thats where she belonged

In the past

She was a bad dream

A dream I was ready to wake up from