This laptop has teeth
Every time I go to type
it tries to bite me!
I give it a little smack
and it growls and bares its fangs at me.
‘Well then type for me ass-hole!’
I yell at it.
It growls again
words start to form
That bitch was actually typing!
It wrote two sentences
and then smiled in triumph
I leaned closer to the screen
and read what it wrote,
‘You’re a shitty writer. You should give it up.’
I snapped it closed and I heard it yelp in pain as it bit its tongue.
‘You’re a pussy!’ I said. ‘And clearly you can’t write either! You’re a useless laptop.’
He snapped himself back open and started to flap it’s mouth like a wild animal.
Wings popped out of its sides and it flew directly for my head.
I slipped and landed a perfect left hook.
It whimpered as it fell to the ground.
I pinned it down to the ground under my foot.
A wicked smile crossed my face.
Looks like I won’t be writing anytime soon.