Philia Nikia

Philia Sophia

And

Philia Nikia

One is the love of wisdom

For the sake of learning and growing

And the other is intellectual competitive bullshit

It’s the love of being right

The difference

Between

A politician

And a professor

Or maybe

A shitty writer (probably wishful thinking)

I will admit

I am a damn competitive person

I mean

I am fighter with a laptop after all

This has been

One of my struggles

Before I ever learned about Philia Nikia

I noticed

My competitiveness

In places

It didn’t need to be

Like in conversation

Or in traffic

Or in relationships

Competition is rooted in the bones of Americans

It’s the wheel that spins capitalism

So

How

Do I

Integrate it

In a healthy way?

Or is it needed at all?

If I could just leave the competitiveness in the ring

And flow with the rest of life

That would be great

But

It isn’t so easy

To change

It’s a process

And I hope

Someday

I’ll be better

But I must practice it

Before I can

Embody it

A broken record, that I am.

Spinning the same songs

To myself

Over and over again

Until

They stick.

We are given an inch

In an infinite universe

To move the mind

I plan to

Take that fucking inch

And change who I am.

The forever fight for free-will.

Now we know

It was never free.

-C.H.