I think I suffer from ‘little man’s syndrome’
When I see someone my same weight class
In my mind
I am so much bigger than him
And I am shocked
That he weighs the same as me
And when I step on the scale
I am in denial
‘How can I weigh 140lbs??
All I do is workout and eat out!’
It’s a block in the psyche
A delusion
I feel like I am stronger
Faster
Smarter
A harder worker
More skilled
Then all these other fighters
Maybe it’s a good delusion
But maybe
It isn’t
I’m not sure
But it makes me think
About how I see myself
And everyone else
And how many layers
Of delusions
Live in the psyche
I fought this guy recently
And he looked huge
I wondered how much weight he had to cut to make 135lbs
His biceps were massive
Way bigger than my noodle arms
But when we fought
I beat him easily
And afterwards
He went up to me
And asked me
How the hell do I make 135lbs
I told him I thought the same thing about him!
And it made me think
About competition
And fear
And how can build up something in our psyche
That isn’t real
It made me wonder
How many layers of delusions live
In our own psyche.
-C.H.
Comments