Funeral
Friends and family had gathered.
It was evening and the last light from the sun was fading.
“Does anyone know why they called us all here?” someone asked.
“No idea.”
“They said there would be food? Where's the food?”
In walked the bride and groom, a cold wind escorting them.
“What's this all about?” a young man, with blonde hair, blue eyes and a sad smile, asked.
“It's a funeral,” she said, in all black.
“Who died?”
“Our relationship,” he said, also in all black.
“You two broke up?” her mom asked.
“We did.”
“I don't believe it,” her mom said, waving them off.
“It's true,” he said, stepping forward. “We're done.”
“We've prepared a video of all of our best moments to remember us by.”
"How cheesy."
“Where's the food??”
“Pizza is coming.”
“If y'all could be seated so we can begin the service, that would be appreciated.”
“Is there any booze??” her dad asked.
“No, dad, there isn't any–” the groom pulled out two flasks and a diet Pepsi and handed it over to her mom and dad.
“Bless you, Chet. You were always my favorite. Come party with us anytime,” her mom said.
The bride cleared her throat, irritated at them.
She started the video and all of their best moments played and all of their favorite songs made up the soundtrack.
It lasted 37 minutes.
A few cried;
A few held it in.
They all loved them.
They all rooted for them to make it.
But this was the end.
“What a party!” her mom declared as they were leaving. “Let's do it again in another two years! Cheers!”
“Hun?” her dad asked. “Was this a wedding or a funeral?”
“Ha! I thought it was an anniversary!”
They laughed and laughed and laughed and Chet drove her parents to their hotel room and drank with them until the first light of the next day reflected off their beer cans and into their bloodshot eyes.
The bride was pouting. Unable to understand why no one was taking her seriously, she wandered the streets at night and wondered why she wasn't happy.
Searching for something shiny,
until the first light reflected off the tears in her eyes.
CH 10/30/26
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