Uncle Murphy

I met a 500 year old tree the other day. It was the largest Ponderosa Pine in the world. He was huge. And when he spoke, I just about crapped my pants. 

He said, “The more you fear something, the more likely you are to focus on it, which increases the probability of it happening.”

I asked, “Murphy’s Law? Or a self-fulfilling prophecy?” 

But the tree was already back asleep.

A few days later, I met a mountain. 

He told me, “Fear distorts perception, making us focus on negative outcomes, magnifying the likelihood of failure.”

“Cognitive Bias?” I asked him. 

But he was already frozen solid.

And a week after that, I met a beautiful river on a sunny April day. 

She said, “Anxiety interferes with performance, leading to the mistakes we originally feared.”

“Behavioral Impact?” I asked. 

But she was already long gone. 

I looked in the mirror after that and my reflection told me, 

“I loved from fear. I wasn't secure enough with who I am. I was terrified of losing her. 

I caused this. I predicted this. From the very start, I loved from a place of fear—which isn’t really love at all . . . I did this to myself.”

And now I can’t help but feel as if I am right. 

A voice from above whispers, “Don’t you dare to ever mistake her uncertainty for your inadequacy.”

I sit on the toilet with my head in my hands. 

“But how much accountability and responsibility am I supposed to take? I am just as broken, aren’t I? I could’ve been so much better . . .”

Nature just nods along this time.

CH 2/17/26