This time—. . .
This time I—. . .
This time I will. . . get it right, I bet. . .
I’ll live so big that even after I am dead I won’t forget it
I bet I can beat regret. . .
Yes, this time I can be someone
I can write a line that lives past me
Profoundly past me
This time I will write a line that will live
I will bring art to life
And this time
It’ll rise
And rise and rise
This time I will be one of a kind
This time I won’t do drugs and I’ll sharpen my mind
This time I will be alive
Not stuck to a screen
Wondering what this life really means
Wondering if this world isn’t what it seems
If nothing is what it appears to be
And then staying in my home alone
Not being brave enough to go out and explore
To see if it is true that there is more. . .
Yes, this time—. . .
I will—. . .
Well, shit
Hopefully this time will be different
This time I won’t get stuck
I won’t settle
I won’t spend my time trying to fuck
Any woman that moves
This time I’ll find my groove
This time I’ll have everything to lose
I will, won’t I?
I will. . . won’t I?
If I was given time again
Surely I wouldn’t just waste it all again?
If I was given time again
I would spend that time truly living
Again and again and again
If I was given time again. . .
. . . would I waste it all again?
I’ll live a life so big that I won’t forget about it even after I have died,
And when I remember it
I will be grateful that this time
I tried.
CH 3/2/24
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