Slipping Away

No bar is good enough for me anymore

No coffee shop

No sentence

No word

None of it

Feels

Right

Not anymore

Something changed

And now

I am restless again

I can’t find a place

Or a head-space

To write

All I want to do

Is

Have sex

And not worry

About my book

And this poetry

That I still

Make myself do

It isn’t flowing out

Like it used too

And I am stuck

Searching

For a new place

To settle into

Idea’s come

But usually

When I can’t write them down

And they slip away

Like yesterday . . .

I am looking for someone

But driving

Everyone else away

And it slips away . . .

Like yesterday . . .

I am hungry for something

That doesn’t exist

Blaming everything on the outside

For the broken insides

Feeding myself

Lies

A perpetual state of

Lies

So I keep getting high

Even when my throat

Swells shut

I smoke

And try to laugh off yesterday

Like it was a bad joke

And hope

Seems like a

Hope

These days

Everything is just out of reach

Like tomorrow

Like

Yesterday . . .

And it just

Fades

Away . . .

And is gone

Forever . . .

Another day

Into the never

Wishing to be better

Hoping to be clever

But never

Is never

And it last for

Forever

Yet

It still

Finds a way

To slip away . . .

-C.H.