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Mental Note


It was a very impromptu first date


We talked about our lives for a while 


She told me that she's never been passionate about anything


I told her that being passionate has it's pros and cons


She asked what the cons were


I told her that when you're passionate about things

That boredom

Is your biggest enemy


Passionate people have a tough time working basic jobs that are unrelated to their passions


Passionate people need to be constantly working hard on a project that they love


Passionate people feel disconnected from those that aren't passionate


I told her

That the biggest fear that a lot of passionate people have is

‘Existential boredom’.


I told her that it's a fight that I am always fighting.


. . .


Well. . .


She went to the bathroom

And came back

Saying that her friend locked herself out of her apartment

And that she needed to leave immediately

And help her friend out


I knew that she was lying

And it stung a little

But I didn't say anything



I closed my tab and she left without saying goodbye.


I made a mental note to myself

To never again

Talk about my mental health

On a first date


The reaction I got from doing so was— . . .


. . .


. . .


. . .


And the next day

As I went to my favorite place to work on my book

She was there

On another date

With someone else


And I didn't really care at all


I just felt bad for the guy


I just wanted to tell him not to express any honest emotion at all.


CH 2/16/24

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