Mental Note

It was a very impromptu first date

We talked about our lives for a while 

She told me that she's never been passionate about anything

I told her that being passionate has it's pros and cons

She asked what the cons were

I told her that when you're passionate about things

That boredom

Is your biggest enemy

Passionate people have a tough time working basic jobs that are unrelated to their passions

Passionate people need to be constantly working hard on a project that they love

Passionate people feel disconnected from those that aren't passionate

I told her

That the biggest fear that a lot of passionate people have is

‘Existential boredom’.

I told her that it's a fight that I am always fighting.

. . .

Well. . .

She went to the bathroom

And came back

Saying that her friend locked herself out of her apartment

And that she needed to leave immediately

And help her friend out

I knew that she was lying

And it stung a little

But I didn't say anything

I closed my tab and she left without saying goodbye.

I made a mental note to myself

To never again

Talk about my mental health

On a first date

The reaction I got from doing so was— . . .

. . .

. . .

. . .

And the next day

As I went to my favorite place to work on my book

She was there

On another date

With someone else

And I didn't really care at all

I just felt bad for the guy

I just wanted to tell him not to express any honest emotion at all.

CH 2/16/24