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Therapy (Part 3)

“Aye Doc! What’s crappening??”


“Oh you know, same shit, different day.”


“Holy shit Doc! I’ve been saying, ‘what’s crappening?’ for ten years and no one has nailed a response like that! Bravo sir.”


“It was too easy really. You lobbed it up for me. It was low hanging fruit. My mother used to say that I would make a great standup comedian.”


“My mother used to say that I’d make a great pastor.”


“Mother’s can be funny, can’t they?”


“Sure, Doc.”


“Have you thought more about forgiving your mother since the last time we spoke?”


“Is that what you wanted me to get out of the last conversation?? Sheesh Doc, I thought you were saying that I should hit up Miahna and see what she’s up to.”



“I almost did…”


“So you don’t want to forgive your mother? You’re still holding onto the past?”


“The past is what has made me, Doc. I forgave my mom for most of the childhood stuff a while ago, it’s the present one that I have issues with.”


“How so?”


“She keeps asking for me to go to church with her. She uses her birthday and mothers day as leverage, thinking it’ll sway me to go. But it hasn’t worked in 4 years. I don’t want to go to church with her and she doesn’t respect that. She tries to manipulate me, doc. She always has.”


“What’s wrong with going to church every now and then? A little coffee, a little singing and a little philosophy, what’s so bad about that?”


“I think you mean mythology doc, not philosophy.”


“Maybe there is both in the bible?”


“I don’t want to play pretend for a few hours so my mom can look good in front of her church friends. I’d never ask her to stop being a christian for me, so why should she ask me to pretend to be one for her?”


“I see your points, Clint. And you seem to be pretty stubborn on this one, so we can drop it for now.”


“I know you're a man of faith doc. Listen, it doesn’t bother me. I know that there are good and bad people that take part in every belief system, every philosophy and every political party.”


“Well I am glad it doesn’t bother you. But would it bother you if I said that, I truly believe the answer to most of my patients, who are going through a crisis of meaning, is faith?”


“Faith in God?”


“Faith in anything.”


“You’re right Doc, I am stubborn about this one. Let’s drop it for now, like you suggested.”


“Okay Clint. Last week we were talking about love. Shall we pick up there?”


“Sure.”


“We talked about your mother’s love and the love you felt for your friend Miahna. Should we talk about the next time you fell in love?”


“Sure, but I think we need to call a play from Freud here, and talk about sex first.”


“Oh really? Why sex?”


“Because it was after Miahna that the meaning of sex got really distorted for me.”


“I thought that the key to keeping a woman was good sex.”


“Oh boy.”


“I know, Doc. And I was incredibly insecure about my sex game.”


“Oh no… What did you do? Wait, you thought that you had better get good at sex, so when the next woman you really cared about came along, you’d be able to keep her around.”


“Good lord, Doc! You’re really nailing it today!”


“Good lord?


“Figure of speech…”


“So?”


“So, I had sex with a lot of women.”


“This tracks…”



“It was ‘practice’ for me. And it was fun.”


“You could’ve used a therapist back then.”


“Yeah, no kidding.”


“How many women?”


“I have no idea.”


“Seriously.”


“Super cereal, Doc.”


“Wow… Do you think sex is a problem for you? How has it been for you lately?”


“Grab some popcorn Doc, this shit is about good.”


-C.H.


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