Socrates Would Be Proud

I was supposed to spar today

But I woke up

Incredibly hungover

And I realize

That I’ve written this line

Too many times.

Alcohol

Has not been my friend

It’s been

An anchor

Holding me down.

They say Socrates could drink

And not get drunk

I’d love to learn that

From him.

Dear Plato,

Did you write that down somewhere?

I could use this skill

Or,

I suppose

I could give up alcohol…

What am I saying??

I’ll just pretend to be Socrates

And question everything to everyone

All while drinking

Then

I’ll pretend

That I am not drunk.

I bet he’d be proud

That I’ve adopted

His most important philosophy.

Thank you Socrates

For all the wisdom you’ve inspired in me

And when a cop

Pulls me over

For drunk driving

I’ll just tell him

That I am you.

I think he/she will understand

And let me off

With a warning

Don’t you think so,

Mr. Socrates?

Socrates?

Hello?

Oh?

He’s passed out drunk in hell?

Well shit…

-C.H.