It’s okay
If I am not loved
For deep down
I know
That I hardly love anyone
So why should I expect
Something
That I hardly give to anyone else?
It’s okay
If I am not loved by her
I know
Deep down
That she is poison
But even so
She is the only one
I want to give the little love I have too
But
It’s okay
I don’t need it
I don’t need her
She can have her pretend peace
I’ll just stay here
In pieces
It’s okay if you don’t love me
These words
Aren’t that lovable
And I am not sure
If words alone
Can provide the spark needed
For true love
So I won’t hold my breath
Waiting for love that might never come
It’s probably not okay
If I don’t love myself
In some sort of way
But this morning
When I looked in the mirror
I saw a man
Who I can still be proud of
I haven’t
Killed off everything inside yet
There’s still a fire somewhere
That holds me together
In pieces
Sure
But held together by duct tape and will power
I am doing
Just slightly better
Then my car is.
-C.H.